Wait for me

Things move so fast these days. And I'm here watching things as they go by right through me. I can't catch up. I finally admit that I broke down. Yeay brain, you've won! A big round of applause for you. I thought I didn't trust any boy but somehow I didn't trust girls, too. Some of it, I guess. Those compliments sounded so cynical. I don't know what's wrong and what's right. That saying, 'Where shall I go? To the right where nothing's right or to the left where everyone left?' suits me perfectly. I am lost. I know this is a typical teenager thingy to feel this kind of way but when I try to speak my heart out, when I try to open-up, I froze. I'm speechless. I can't figure out why. Maybe it's because my guards are too high for anyone to climb. And these guards, these walls are so damn thick, are so damn high for anyone to climb up. I don't blame anyone but me. I, myself don't let my guards down even just for a minute, even just for a best friend. And when I try to see myself in someone else's point of view, I see nothing but a loser, I see nothing but some random pathetic girl.They all said I'm just fine, thank God they saw me that way.Yes, I'm tired of acting, but I feel even more tired to answer those questions that I don't even know the answer. Maybe it's better this way even though I can't see things that are worst.